11

about halfway through today, i started to feel badly that it's september 11, and i hadn't thought too much about what happened 11 years ago in the midst of being busy. i started reflecting on it, and about all that has transpired since. i read joe's post, which provided a solemn new perspective.

ground zero on my last day in new york, 2010.

i thought about where i was when i found out the news of september 11. my 8th grade history class was in the library researching stuff for a project and of course i was in charge of drawing things, and doing so diligently. eventually i realized the majority of the class had sauntered out into the main area of the library, where i could see them through the windows of the room in which i was working. their eyes were glued to the tv. i strained to see what they were looking at, but it looked like some action movie. bombs blowing stuff up. being the stalwart student i was, i turned my focus back to my project and continued to work.

of course it wasn't an action movie. it was the news.

***

i just found my journal from that day. apparently it was a tuesday, and i wrote at 11:18pm. it started with "AMERICA GOT ATTACKED TODAY!" in all caps and ended with "I am so thankful for our safety!"

but that's not the part that made me think. out of my journal fell an envelope entitled, "to my future kids" in bubble letters and in it was a letter to them, explaining my feelings about what happened. i'm grateful for my history teacher mr. chilcoat for making us write those letters*. my favorite part: "i didn't want to get all spiritual on you here, but i'm going to anyway." it's kind of interesting to hear my thoughts from then. i was 13. but more so, i'm glad that i was asked to document something that has turned out to be so meaningful.

***

tonight, upon hearing some other truly tragic news that happened only a few hours ago, i realized that it is so important to live every day to its fullest. life can be so resilient, yet so fragile. reflection today has made me want to surrender any hard feelings and hug my family members and friends a little more tightly.

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*i'm also grateful to chilcoat, because he told us that day, "you'll never forget where you were today when you heard of this attack." i honestly would have forgotten a detail such as that had he not made that note. also, according to my journal he taught us about heros the next day, which i felt was a really appropriate way of helping us to understand what was going on.