warm fuzzies and hand snuggleez

author's note: to be honest, this is a post more for me than for you. just a simple experience i wanted to document. the night is dark and cool; i'm writing from my front porch. so, if you'd like to take a break from life's noise and join me on this pretty, quiet evening, go ahead and read how i spent it below. 

after all, i do enjoy company.

i chased the sunset tonight. 

driving home from a friend's gathering around 8pm, i decided i wasn't done with the night. there were other things i could be doing, but the sunset was beautiful, and it drew me in. windows down, i veered into another lane and headed to find a road that would lead me to higher ground to get a good view. 

at first, i was honestly not very concerned with finding the sun; i sang along to my ipod with my windows down. then i realized how fast the view was leaving, and how beautiful it was. so i drove with more intent. faster, higher. found a decent view, but the street was cluttered with teenagers and skateboards. i doubt they even noticed the sky. which was fine. so i drove on, all the while keeping my eyes on the disappearing sun.

eventually i stumbled upon the road that i'd been looking for. drove higher. reached the summit. and, oh, it was beautiful. but fleeting. it was almost gone when i arrived. but i parked and got out, miss holga in hand. i didn't document right away; instead, i savored the moment. 

it was…well. cleansing? pure, maybe? they all sound pretty cheesy and overused, but um, yeah. that.

i took out miss holga and made a couple pictures. then i took out little green sketchbook and made some more.

meanwhile, a couple of cats meandered their way over to me. rubbed against my legs as i stood and thought and drew. 

i hadn't drawn since school got out. but tonight, i needed to create.

one cat was white and tan -- you know those kinds? it got distracted and scampered off. it came back to me a few times but was pretty content chasing bugs and such. 

i turned around and drew the other direction. 

the other cat was white, with a black face and black paws. he stayed nearby, kindly holding various poses for me to draw him. his payment to me was to periodically come back to keep my ankles company. he was soft and and it felt nice.

i finished my tiny drawings and watched the rest of the sky fade. the sun had already gone, but the remnants were intriguing in a new way. 

i stood there, girl against the edge of a mountain, on that hill, for a long time. listened to the crickets and the distant sounds. stood still as the cars passed and the neighbors chatted and the sky changed moods. 

i looked down at my shoes and decided to try to get a photo of my black pawed companion, who was again weaving figure eight patterns around my feet. but after i returned from the car with camera in hand, he turned and trotted across the street. i figured if i walked back to my place and stayed still, like i had when he approached the first time, he might come back. he sat on one side of the road; i stood on the other. we dared each other to move. 

the clouds were beautiful. the sky was a series of dark blues.

a car came between us and whizzed down the hill.  after it passed, i looked at black paws and he looked at me. neither budged. 

i shifted my eyes and again studied the view. the lights around the city had been steadily making their presence known. their twinkling was a nice contrast to the fading natural light and ensuing darkness that settled in.

to my right, the white cat continued to frolic, chasing little invisibles. 

to my left, (and to my dismay), the black pawed cat wandered further away and settled down by a bush. 

i remained still. 

...
..
.


about like that. 

eventually, i quietly thanked the black cat for his companionship, though i doubt he could understand how much i appreciated it (after all, he was a cat) and climbed into my car. wrote some words and stuff. you know. how i do sometimes. 

i started the car and rolled down the window as i pulled out. i strained my eyes to see both cats, very faintly, sitting on the left side of the road, watching me leave. 

i was glad i could share the moment with them. especially with black paws.


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on monday, i wrote. wrote and wrote and wrote. and wrote.
on thursday, i danced. danced and danced and danced. 

yesterday, i ran. ran and ran.

tonight, lots of thoughts were washing over me. i let them come unfiltered. in and out and all around, i could barely contain them all. i wanted to share them with a someone. 

but, i didn't. couldn't. 

instead, i drove. tonight, i drove. drove and…well, you get the picture. 
then i wrote this.

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grow and grow, till tall. 

...